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Deep in the Heart of Taxes
April 13, 2006
10:30 a.m. I really am doing my taxes today. See Susanna. See the pile in the middle of the floor. See Susanna see the pile. Last night someone suggested that since April 15 is on a Saturday the actual deadline is Monday, which in Massachusetts would mean Tuesday because Monday is Patriots Day. (There are plenty of good things to be said about Massachusetts, but this health-care nasty is not one of them.) This does happen when April 15 falls on a Sunday or coincides with Patriots Day, but mail gets collected on Saturday so I don't entirely believe it. The point is that I'm not even going to check it out because I'm doing my taxes today. Don't be fooled by the pile in the middle of the floor: I've already started. I just composed a query letter about The Mud of the Place and sealed it in a big manila envelope with the synopsis, the marketing plan, the first two chapters, my bio, and an SASE. I've e-mailed a copy of my "Terrorist State" blog from April 9 to Huffington.com. If I weren't doing my taxes this morning, I would have put these things off for another week. See Susanna see the pile . . .
11:26 a.m. See Susanna study report of 2005 expenses. See Susanna circle relevant totals. Hear Susanna give thanks for Quicken.
See Susanna scratch head. Does she need to file Form 4562, Depreciation and Amortization? Hear Susanna curse. Curse, curse, curse. Susanna looked in Form 1040 book. Silly Susanna! Susanna knows looking at 1040 instructions is first step on road to psychosis. Susanna does not need Form 4562! Susanna does need a new computer! Morgana IV has been fully depreciated since 31 July 2005.
11:52 a.m. Still sitting at Morgana the Fully Depreciated PC. Constance e-mailed a teaser for Willie Nelson's cover of Ned Sublette's "Cowboys Are Frequently, Secretly (Fond of Each Other)." Of course I had to open, download, and listen. (Memo to self: If you had DSL you'd be dancing with Schedule C by now. There's a lot to be said for dial-up connections.) Love the song, love those dancing prairie dawgs. Taxpayers are frequently, blatantly (fond of procrastination).
12:54 p.m. Done. Well, the down-and-dirty pencil version is done; I still have to copy it over nice and neat in ink. And write a couple of checks. Having made four quarterly payments each to the state and the feds definitely helps -- the checks are considerably smaller than last year's, and I actually have enough money in the checking account to cover both (not May's rent and board bill, however) -- but it's still a chunk. I gaze enviously at all the lines and boxes for deductions I can't take; enviously, that is, until I consider how much pain and suffering each of those deductions represents: mortgage, medical expenses, children . . .
On the state form, the maximum you can deduct for social security tax payments is $2,000. I actually forked over more than $4,000. The maximum rental deduction is $3,000; my annual rent is close to $9,000. Yes, it's nice of them to toss a little bone to those of us who haven't married mortgages but still shell out handsomely for shelter, but if that's what they think rent and social security tax actually cost, no wonder they think $325/month or so for health insurance is "affordable." On the other hand, if I could deduct that amount from my federal tax -- not from my taxable income, mind you; from the tax -- then we could do business.
2:38 p.m. Picked up three days' worth of mail at p.o. Karmic reward for doing civic duty: parcel from Carrie in Kent containing five packets of McVitie's digestives (three plain chocolate, one milk chocolate, and one milk chocolate with caramel, which I'm sure they didn't have when Sir Winston was a pup, or when I lived in England 30 years ago either) and two packets of tea.
8:09 p.m. Still haven't done a lick of paid work all day. What's the point? It just makes my taxes higher.
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