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Stimuli, StimulaMarch 19, 2008 If I paid more attention to the news, I wouldn't have been flummoxed by the IRS communiqué that arrived in my p.o. box earlier this week. Just above my name and address and the bulk-mail info was a box: ENCLOSED IS AN IMPORTANT Throw it away? Never! I took it home and read it. "Economic Stimulus Payment Notice" says the heading, also in red, over a letter that begins "Dear Taxpayer." The gist is that I "may be entitled to a payment of up to $600 ($1,200 if filing a joint return), plus additional amounts for each qualifying child." Well. I turned to the "How to Determine Your Stimulus Payment" table on the back. I don't file a joint return; I don't have any children, qualifying or not; but my Net Income Tax Liability is surely more than zero and my Qualifying Income (last I looked) is at least $3,000. I think my government wants to give me $600, but lest I jump to conclusions I am cautioned: "The IRS will determine eligibility, figure the amount, and send the payment." Nowhere in the letter is a connection made between these $600 payments and "economic stimulus," but though I don't read the newspapers, I am no dummy. The Bush administration and its house experts recently copped to the fact that the economy is slumping. Slumping economies need to be stimulated, "stimulate" means "spend money," so the Bush administration and Congress are opening the spigots and letting money flow out. I assumed that the money was going to flow to the same old suspects, i.e., the big corporations and bureaucracies that are always first in line at the trough. Cynical me! It seems our elected officials have arranged for a splattering of dollars to reach us middle-to-low-income people way in the back. The IRS doesn't disclose the connection between economic stimulus and my $600 (maybe) payment, but I know that too: I am supposed to take my $600 and go spend it. This will stimulate the economy and create jobs. Sounds like even the hardcore supply-siders are acknowledging the demand side. Americans, says Barbara Ehrenreich (author of Nickel and Dimed and other essential books), are "the world's designated shoppers." Not only does our shopping make the world go round, it's patriotic. If we shop till we drop, or at least till the $600 runs out, we're helping revive the economy that underwrites the American Way of Life. And that is enough to make me consider giving my $600 back to the government. Only for a moment, mind you: once the reactionary impulse passed, I was grossed out by the mere thought of voluntarily giving anything to the right-wing loonies, amoral corporations, and moderate mediocrities currently running the country. I'm not, and never have been, one of those people who are so disgusted with the status quo that they want to see the economy, or the country, completely collapse. Be careful what you wish for, I say: neither I nor the overwhelming majority of them are likely to do well in the absence of political, economic, and social order. "Collapse" is what happened to the old Soviet Union (and the tsarist empire before it), and to old Yugoslavia. "Collapse" is what the United States has brought upon Iraq. If those scenarios look better than your current situation, by all means get out there and promote collapse. Just don't look for me at your back. Nevertheless, we'd do well to think a little harder about what we're stimulating. Ever had a frozen water pipe burst and start spraying water all over your basement? You don't stimulate the flow of water; you turn it off till you fix the pipe and can once again control where the water goes. Say you're driving down the road and your brakes fail, your steering locks, your tire blows out, or your radiator starts smoking. Do you immediately hit the accelerator? Hell, no; you do your damnedest to guide your car to the side of the road, and then you call for help. True, you can't turn the economy off, or wrestle it to the side of the road, but the same principle applies: Don't stimulate a process unless you're happy with what it's producing. The U.S. of A. is a run-amok semi on a two-lane road. Where's the driver? Some people thought God was in charge, or maybe it was the market, or maybe God and the market are two names for the same thing? Whoever it is, is asleep at the wheel, or drunk, or nuts, or maybe he bailed out when no one was looking. A whole bunch of people are chasing after, but they're riding mopeds and they aren't gaining ground. Take your six hundred bucks and spend them wisely.
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